Personal Testimony

Restoring the Culture of Love at the International Institute for Culture

By CHRISTINA M. CONAWAY
CS&T Youth / Young Adult Coordinator

Who would think that an engagement would come from a five-week class taught by Dr. John M. Haas, on “Human Sexuality and Marriage” offered at the International Institute for Culture (IIC) this past fall?
I knew Mario, now my fiancé, for a short time when we spent a day in prayer at St. Charles Seminary sponsored by Young Adults of St. Katherine’s and St. Isaac Jogues (YASKI). The day consisted of a holy hour, walking rosary and evening prayer. After seeing his faith life in action and learning more about how God was working in our lives, Mario and I committed ourselves to prayer about God’s intention in our lives.
At that point, I had tried out the world’s idea of dating; getting to know someone for a while and then discerning if they were the “one” and if it didn’t work out, just moving on to the next person. I was tired of this whole “dating game scene” so I took a year off from dating to really use this time to discern God’s will in my life.
I vowed that I would not “date” according to the world’s standards, but rather, commit myself to waiting patiently for God’s will to be revealed in my life. I admit, it was tempting at times to accept dating offers, but God gave me the strength to wait. God truly put it in my heart to guard my heart till the Lord said “He is worthy.”

Mario Dickerson and Christina Conaway

In later conversation with Mario, I discovered he also was discerning God’s will regarding his future. I mentioned the classes on “Human Sexuality and Marriage” for which I had signed up. I wanted to know more about the Church’s view of marriage and sexuality. Mario expressed interest in gaining a solid understanding of the Church’s teaching on sexuality since much of society is deaf to what the Church teaches.
We decided to meet in the front row of class that Monday evening. The first class presented an overview of moral methodology and the goods of human sexuality. We learned that within the context of marriage, human sexuality reaches its fullest expression, man and woman gain friendship, mutual support, a cure for concupiscence (lust) and join together with God to create human life.
In contrast to the world’s misunderstanding of sexuality, our Church defends the sanctity of marriage and the sacredness of sexuality as expressed in the marital embrace. “What God wants is for all to be holy. He wants you to keep away from fornication, and each one of you know how to use the body that belongs to him in a way that is holy and honorable, not giving way to selfish lust like the pagans who do not know God.” (Persona Humana, XI)
After the first class, we prayed for God’s will to be revealed in terms of our lives whether it be together or with someone else. We said an “Our Father,” “Hail Mary,” “Glory Be” and went our separate ways. However, God was beginning to create less and less separation between our hearts. Every Monday we met at the IIC for class and prayer.
The structured environment and classroom setting created a forum for discussion and exploration of our Catholic faith and also revealed our relationship expectations and desires. We discovered how open we both were to life and how in the context of marriage we wanted to receive from God all the children he would send us, learning that the “transmission of human life is a most serious role in which married people collaborate freely and responsibly with God the Creator.” (Humanae Vitae, 1)
Being exposed to Church teaching and having it explained by Dr. Haas in an understandable and, at times, humorous manner was an extraordinary way to get know each other and share the most precious part of ourselves, our Catholic faith. Other course material included an overview of Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body, the Church’s contraception stance, infertility and reproductive technology, homosexuality and the gay movement. The final class culminated in learning about the nature of marriage as indissovable, unitive and procreative.
It confirmed for us that, in light of Church teaching, “the primary end of marriage is the procreation and education of children; the second end is mutual support and a remedy for concupiscence.”
In God’s loving design, marriage is a sacramental sign of grace — representing the union of Christ and His Church. “Marriage, then, is … the wise and provident institution of God the Creator, whose purpose was to effect in man His loving design. … Husband and wife, through their mutual gift of themselves, develop that union of two persons in which they perfect one another, cooperating with God in the generation and rearing of new lives.” (Humanae Vitae, 8)
Spending our dating period exploring the Church’s definition of marriage by reading “Humanae Vitae,” discussing family life and how to strengthen it, receiving God’s blessings and discovering how to use our gifts to strengthen God’s Kingdom, was a way to get to know what was really important about the other person. Pope John Paul II urges us to restore the true meaning of human sexuality so that we can build a culture of love and life.
In the vocation of marriage, spiritually strong family units give witness to the mission of Christ’s Church, while at the same time strengthening our nation. Children are valued, not scorned; relationships are free, total, faithful and fruitful and filled with sacrificial love — bearing witness to the sacrifice Christ made for us.
These foundations, laid early in our relationship, created a bond rich in Church teaching, built a strong understanding of our roles as man and woman and prepared us for marriage — exactly where God was leading us. In retrospect, I can see how God used that time of discernment to shape and mold me for the vocation of marriage.
Two weeks and three classes later, we were engaged. The IIC, led by Dr. Haas, president and professor, thoughtfully presented sensitive material, broke through cultural stereotypes and engaged the students.
The classes helped reveal God’s will in my life and soon-to-be husband, Mario, to the vocation of marriage. In this vocation called marriage, holiness is our calling, Christ is our leader and life-giving love is our purpose.
Dr. Haas and the Institute offers many diverse programs which foster family life and help to create what Pope John Paul II calls “a truly sovereign and spiritually vigorous nation” (Letter to Families).
For more information on the IIC, call (215) 877-9910 or visit www.iiculture.org

Contact Christina Conaway at (215) 587-3668 or cconaway@adphila.org.