Lust v. chastity: The scorpion attacks the virgin
By Susan Brinkmann
CS&T Correspondent
It has a way of hiding under the most innocuous labels — the right
to choose, diversity, free love, tolerance. And just like its symbol,
the scorpion, it loves to hide in shadowy places, behind society’s
most heinous crimes, such as abortion, adultery, rape, prostitution, pornography.
What is this sinister force? The sin of lust.
Even our most clever and sanitizing labels cannot cover the fact that
the sin of lust remains the source of our nation’s most heartbreaking
epidemics — from soaring divorce and sex-crime rates to record levels
of sexually transmitted diseases and unwed births. All of these modern
ills can be traced back to the same source — the disordered desire
for sexual pleasure.
Looking at lust through the lens of reality makes it much easier to understand
why the Church teaches: “Sexual pleasure is morally disordered when
sought for itself, isolated from its procreative and unitive purposes”
(CCC2351).
Once this sexual pleasure is removed from the realm of its created purpose,
things can get very ugly very fast.
The authors of “The Seven Capital Sins” call lust the sin
of impurity. “It is a shameful vice because it changes a good and
beautiful power into sin. … Impurity wraps itself around all our
senses and through them enters our soul. It blinds us to spiritual values,
darkens our minds, weakens our will and leads us to place a created good
before God.”
This is precisely why the Blessed Mother told the three children at Fatima
that more souls go to hell because of sins of the flesh than for any other
sin. It’s a powerful vice that, much like an addiction to alcohol,
is impossible to resist once tasted. The only known antidote to the poisonous
sting of lust is complete chastity.
Lust doesn’t always manifest itself as a big, blatant sin. It often
starts out small and subtle.
“The heart is one of the deeper ways that we can lust and sin through
impurity, particularly if our heart is divided or if all human affection
is not brought under control,” writes Mother Nadine Brown in her
book, “Bathe Seven Times.”
No matter whom we choose to love, God must never lose His place as the
King of our hearts. Otherwise, we risk being lured into relationships
that aren’t healthy, particularly those of a sensual nature.
That is when unchecked affection starts to become our master. “Remember,
we can’t always control the first impulse or the first feeling or
thought,” Mother Nadine writes, “but it’s what we’re
going to do about it that will either lead us into or away from sin.”
We must learn how to love others with a spiritual love that respects the
dignity of persons, she says: “Excessive familiarity with anyone
whom we shouldn’t be excessively familiar with leads us into occasions
of sin. For example, spouses shouldn’t be excessively familiar with
anyone of the opposite sex other than their spouse.”
She advises that we be careful when choosing our own companions and also
our children’s companions, because many of those friendships may
not be healthy.
Another subtle way lust can take control of us occurs when we allow ourselves
to be too curious, Mother Dean writes: “Curiosity is not a virtue,
as it can lead to a lot of impurity. Today, the internet is a great source
of temptation for many people. Our eyes are wonderful gifts, and as with
all gifts, they have a flip-side of potential vice.”
The eyes, which are the windows of the soul, can easily lead us into sin,
so we must be careful what we look at or read. Modern forms of entertainment,
including music, may be laced with impure suggestions.
“Our ears can also be occasions of the sin of impurity through listening
to what we shouldn’t be listening to, such as off-color jokes, TV
programs or movies,” Mother Nadine writes. “Music can be dangerous,
as it bypasses the senses and goes right into our spirit. … We live
in a culture where everything is accepted, and sometimes we’re not
aware that [something] really isn’t pure. … We need self-knowledge
to know what we can or cannot take in.”
Lust can also manifest itself as an immoderate desire for food or drink.
“We can commit sins of impurity through taste by eating to satisfy
[our] appetite instead of eating, because [we] need to eat this to get
energy and stay healthy,” writes Mother Nadine.
“One of the best ways to counteract this is through the fasting
that the Church has so widely recommended throughout the years. Our eating
can become the ‘end’ rather than the ‘means.’
… There has to be a certain amount of self-denial.”
We must even be on our guard against lust in the ways it can manifest
itself in our spiritual life, she warns.
“Theologians tell us that beginners in the spiritual life are very
subject to lust, because in the beginning stages of the spiritual life,
they receive a lot of consolations,” Mother Nadine says. “Our
spirit receives these consolations as refreshments, renewal, and satisfaction
in God.”
But if we’re not careful, we can begin to hang onto those consolations.
When that happens, “we can get out of balance to the point where
we’re seeking self-gratification,” Mother Nadine writes. “Now
we’re on the border of going into lust.”
Keeping our balance, especially in regard to sensual desires, is critical
if we want to keep ourselves safe from the tyranny of lust. At the same
time, however, people can go overboard and actually begin to be afraid
of intimacy.
“Sometimes people think, ‘If I close myself up like a prune
and don’t get too close to anyone, then I will stay pure,’”
Mother Nadine writes. “Satan would love that, but actually this
is totally opposite from the truth.”
She discovered that when she noticed that lust was a vice she rarely saw
in the cloister. During prayer, the Lord helped her to understand that
was because the sisters spent all day loving — loving God and loving
each other. Thus, their hearts were pure.
In other words, in order to avoid lust, we must concentrate on learning
how to love truly, not in a selfish and lusting way, but purely and selflessly.
“It is love that purifies the heart,” Mother Nadine says.
“The more we love, the purer our heart becomes.”
Contact Susan Brinkmann at fiat723@aol.com or (215) 965-4615.
Chastity: The virtue of a pure heart
By NADIA POZO
CS&T Staff Writer
In order to overcome lust — whether it is lust of the senses, intellect,
power, honor, recognition or any number of things we overwhelmingly and
inordinately desire — one needs a pure heart.
We don’t usually think further and deeper than considering sexual
lust and the need for chastity, but the vice of lust goes deeper than
distorted sexual desires.
It’s more than a sex “thing,” it’s a heart “thing.”
“Christ sees in the heart, in man’s inner-self, the source
of purity,” Pope John Paul II said in one of his general papal audience
messages on purity.
That is because, as Jesus tells us in the Gospel of Matthew, “What
comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a man.
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, fornication,
theft, false witness, slander” (Mt 15:18-20) when our hearts are
not pure.
What we hold deep in our hearts reveals to us what we value most, what
we love most, what we’re most attached to and desire. If those things
aren’t centered on God, their disordered attraction is expressed
in a multitude of sins that can all be traced back to a lack of purity
of heart.
But the opposite is also true. When we seek God above all things —
when we’ve allowed God to transform our hearts — we come to
see all things as God sees them. We see God reflected in each person we
meet, we see God in all situations, and see His majesty in all of His
creation.
Then, we love purely, our intentions are pure. We seek only to bring others
closer to God, not to ourselves. Our actions, thoughts and words are all
centered on one thing: God.
That is not an impossible task — it’s our calling.
Jesus tells us: “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your
heart, with all your being, with all your strength, and with all your
mind, and your neighbor as yourself” (Luke 10: 27).
We were made to love God, who is our truest and deepest joy, but we often
go looking for that love and joy in all the wrong places.
“Man cannot live without joy; therefore, when he is deprived of
true spiritual joys, it is necessary that he become addicted to carnal
pleasures,” explained St. Augustine.
In a society that has cut God out of the picture, is it a wonder that
our culture is obsessed with carnal pleasures?
And since we live in that environment, we, too, are affected, which is
why we need to be aware that our hearts need purification.
How do we do it? The first thing is to choose God.
Let’s admit it: Sometimes we toy with sin as a cat plays with a
mouse in its paws. We say we’ve chosen God, but yet, in one or more
areas of our lives, we make compromises. Those impurities hold us back
from chastity.
We’re only fooling ourselves when we claim to know God and yet tolerate
sin in our lives. To be attached to anything other than God is idolatry.
So the first question is: Have we really chosen God?
“When we choose God, we are choosing to reject all that is not of
God. This is why the gift of the Holy Spirit of Fear of the Lord is especially
operative here,” writes Mother Nadine, foundress of the religious
order, Intercessors of the Lamb. “Fear of the Lord is the beautiful
gift of the Holy Spirit [that gives us] the deep hatred of sin and fear
to displease God in any way.
“Through this awareness of and hatred for sin, we will choose, like
Jesus, to do only what please the Father ... The gift of Fear of the Lord
will begin to strengthen us with such a hatred for sin that it will begin
to uproot all the avenues and areas of lust in our lives,” Mother
Nadine adds. “This gift helps us to spot it, to hate it, and to
have the power to do something about it. It’s a tremendous gift.”
The next step for us is to realize that we cannot — nor are
we expected to — do it alone. Ultimately we have to remember
that God is the heart doctor. We have to give it all to Him.
He will help us grow and foster the virtues of chastity, temperance and
modesty, which are all key to gaining pure hearts.
Chastity is the virtue that regulates our most basic desires, from eating
to procreating. Chastity helps us have an undivided heart, so that we
can love God and others more fully. It also purifies our intentions, so
that the reason for doing anything is for the Lord, not ourselves.
Temperance — the practice of moderation — will bring
about tremendous modesty and restraint, Mother Nadine tells us.
“When our senses are not mortified, they leave open doors. Temperance
will bring about a balanced sexuality within us,” she said.
Fasting is an age-old discipline in the battle against lust. It helps
us slowly gain control over the desires of the body. But today, Catholics
often overlook the value of fasting.
As for modesty, the Catechism of the Catholic Church tells us: “Purity
requires modesty, an integral part of temperance. Modesty protects the
intimate center of the person. It means refusing to unveil what should
remain hidden. … It guides how one looks at others and behaves toward
them in conformity with the dignity of persons and their solidarity.
“Modesty protects the mystery of persons and their love. It encourages
patience and moderation in loving relationships; it requires that the
conditions for the definitive giving and commitment of man and woman to
one another be fulfilled. ... Modesty inspires a way of life which makes
it possible to resist the allurements of fashion and the pressures of
prevailing ideologies” (2521-23).
God will help us make these virtues our own; we only need to ask.
Prayer, the sacrament of reconciliation and the Eucharist are absolutely
necessary to win the battle against lust.
And, as our reward for our work, the Beatitudes say, we shall see God.
CS&T staff writer Nadia Pozo can be reached at npozo@adphila.org
or (215) 965-4614.
Call on Lady Wisdom
There isn’t a more perfect person to turn to when we desire to have
pure hearts than Mary.
In fact, it was Jesus who alluded to that, when He said from the cross:
“Behold your Mother,” (Jn 19:27).
Mary had the purest of hearts — her heart belongs completely
to God.
Through her immaculate Conception, her total freedom from sin, she is
calling us more and more to be reborn into sinlessness and to have sin
uprooted from us.
“That doesn’t mean the temptations will cease — they
won’t,” Mother Nadine tells us. “But it does mean the
temptations won’t be able to influence us as they have in the past
.... [Mary] wants to share every grace that she has received from God
with her children. She will do it if we allow her. She can fill us with
hope if we can really behold her, go to her in prayer, and behold her
beautiful, immaculate heart and her sinlessness.”
“When [we have] surrendered and [are] not fighting God, He can work
very quickly. Our Lady shows us and gives us the grace to surrender because
she’s Lady Wisdom. Surrender is the highest form of wisdom,”
Mother Nadine adds.
“We go to Our Lady and beg for the grace to surrender to whatever
way God is calling us into deeper purification,” she writes. “Therefore,
recourse to the rosary isn’t a bad idea if we’re hoping to
grow in the virtues of chastity, temperance, modesty and fear of the Lord
— all in an effort to be pure of heart.”